No one expects a new car pamphlet to be a soberand restrained document, free of hyperbole and extrapolation. But the Mazda 626 brochure that I picked up at the same time as the 626 Classic Hatch (that we tested a month or so ago), strained credibility to the max. I guess the fact that we were so disappointed with the car also made me peruse the pamphlet more closely than usual, trying to find what Mazda thinks are the car's best points, when we could find almost none.
The opening line is unfortunate: "We haven't been standing still for last 21 years." It's a reference to the fact that the 626 as a nameplate has been around for that length of time; but it prompts the response - maybe not 21 years, but perhaps seven or eight years... You turn the page to read, "...a drag co-efficient of 0.29 for the sedan and hatch and 0.34 for the wagon... increases stability...." Er, scuse me. The co-efficient of drag is an indication of how slippery the car is at zero angle of yaw. It tells you nothing whatsoever about front and rear axle lift (Clf and Clr), it tells you nothing about the location of the centre of pressure - in fact the Cd factor has bugger-all to do with aero stability!
"...the design team behind the 626 have (sic) thought of everything, creating an exterior which combines form, function and style in a more insightful way than any car in its class." Insightful, eh? Not 'practical', or 'beautiful', or 'intelligent', no, none of these - 'insightful' is the word. I mean, everyone wants a car with insight, don't they? And again, Mazda then adds the classic line, "It's just what you'd expect from people who have been working on the same car for 21 years." I meantersay, 21 years is enough time for anyone to gain insight, isn't it?
"The design for the interior... is based on Mazda's unique principle of OptiSpace.... Put simply, it feels bigger than it is." Oh right then. Your elbows won't mind hitting things because the cabin feels bigger, after all. And when you tell your suitcases about OptiSpace, they'll obligingly shrink in size. The irony in all this rubbish is that the 626 is in fact very roomy inside - forget OptiSpace, Mazda, just give some comparative measurements!
"Get behind the wheel and you'll soon appreciate how the spirited new 626 has the power to move you." If you didn't read our test report by now you'll be musing - what's it got? 110kW? A sixteen second quarter mile? Well, the 626 actually snails across the standing 400 metres in the mid eighteens... But there's more. "This inspiring level of performance has been achieved through Mazda's principle of OptiDrive..." Ohmygod! Now there's OptiDrive to go with OptiSpace... geez, Mazda must have been spitting chips when Shell introduced OptiMax...
Nearing the end of the glossy there's a weird semi-transparent view of the car. Points are highlighted, including the fact that "Triple H construction" is used "for increased stability and protection". Wow! They're not using good ol' Triple H are they? Well, I'll be... But they're not resting on their laurels with just that: turn the page! There you'll find MAIDOS, Mazda's Advanced Impact Distribution and Absorption System. Still have doubts? They'll be quelled when you realise that the 626 is made at the Hofu Plant using IQAB - Integrated Quality Analysis and Build.
You know, after I'd driven the 626 for a week I didn't get out saying - it's a competent but boring car with an excellent ride and good interior space. No, instead I exclaimed in joy, "That OptiDrive just lets you really enjoy all the OptiSpace to the absolute max. And when it dawned on me that MAIDOS used Triple H, I just felt so much better, especially with the IQAB construction. I'll just have to go out and buy one this very minute...Oh Mazda, you've really done it for me!"
Gawd....
Talking about aerodynamics,the optimal low-drag shape is a three dimensional teardrop. The gently curved leading face deflects air around it, the flow staying attached. The long tail gradually draws the streamlines together, decreasing the size of the wake to a minimum. The Cd of a teardrop shape can be as low as 0.05. Some early aerodynamic cars were based closely on this shape - but with the complete lower half slice off to give a flat floor. In terms of gaining low drag coefficients, they were very successful. However, car designs these days focus more on the requirements for good interior cabin packaging, engine cooling requirements and styling than aiming just at a low Cd.
But there is one current car that matches the 'teardrop' specification spectacularly well. The hemispherical shape flows smoothly into the roof and sides of the car, the following sheet metal decreasing smoothly in height. Looking at the car, you can really see how a small wake would result, and how there'd be only a little turbulence around those vital leading and trailing edges. The car I'm talking about? The Daewoo Lanos, when it's sold without that rear extension spoiler.
Course, to get the effect that I'm talking about, you'd need to put the car into the wind tunnel backwards! Have a look next time that you're following one in traffic; I'm sure that you'll agree....
I've always thought that people who are one-eyedsingle brand fanatics need to have their heads read. You know, "I am a Holden man. Me dad drove Holdens all of his life, and this is my fifth 'Olden. They're tough, easy to work on, and don't let you down. Wouldn't ever drive a Ford - gotta have a Holden." Et cetera, et cetera. I'm always tempted to reply at this point, "Yeah, me too. I've had two Camiras and loved 'em both!" The latter statement's quite factual, but it doesn't usually mesh very well with the Holden Hero's concept of Holdenality.
And you can replace Holden with any brand. "I just love my BMW - it's a true Driver's Car, just like all BMWs." To which you reply, "Yep, the 318i - any 318i over the last 20 years - is a real powerhouse, isn't it?" Or "Toyotas just handle so well - always have, really." Then you can grin, "Remember the Toyota T18? Called the Macho Machine by Toyota and the Marshmallow Machine by everyone else!" Simply, not every car from a single manufacturer is a good car. Or to put it another way, a good car is a good car whatever its badge.
So, no, I don't have any brand loyalty at all. In fact the list of brands that I have owned looks like this: Honda, Alfa Romeo, BMW, Holden, Rover, Daihatsu, Subaru, Daihatsu, Nissan, Holden, Nissan, Holden, Audi, Volvo. (Many of these cars have been owned simultaneously.) My next car could be a Ford, or a Peugeot, or a Mitsubishi. I couldn't care less about the brand. After all, 10 years ago no one would have dreamt that Subaru would be the lust badge of choice for kids drawing cars in their school texts...
But where does this philosophy leave one-brand car clubs? After all, I'm a member of Club Audi Australia (not that it does me much good when all club events are held in Sydney and Melbourne!). When I think of one-make car clubs I always remember back to when I owned my BMW. I went to a BMW club day - nothing formal, just a display of BMWs on a country oval. All BMW owners - not just club members - were invited and the day turned out to be a pleasant and friendly experience. This was back in the mid-Eighties, but the BMW ambience was much the same as it is today.
It was also the time when some really brilliant small cars were being released - and there weren't too many BMWs among them. Four wheel drive, turbos, good handling - Japan was on the up and up. And parked out the back, well away from any of the displayed BMWs, was a brand new Mazda 323 4WD Turbo. One of the club members had taken off the BMW shades and looked around, deciding that the Mazda was a car much superior to anything with a propeller badge available around the same dollars. Trouble was, the rest of the club didn't want to acknowledge him...
This doesn't mean that you can't be an enthusiast for a particular marque, of course. It's when you step over the line and start pronouncing all cars from that manufacturer as good 'uns that I start to wonder. I mean, if you're a current Jaguar fanatic does that mean that you like Fords as well? Some of the technology is now shared.... Or, if you love Alfas, do you also love bits and pieces of Fiats? Should the Audi club also recognize Volkswagen owners?
I'm happy to read a history of Peugeot, or of Ford, or of Porsche. I love going to one-marque display days when I can ogle a sequence of historical cars and talk to knowledgeable owners. But when they start to sprout stuff about their marque's cars being just the best, I quietly leave....
